EFFin’ Unsound

Post by Carl

This may be the craziest Guzzo ever. No small task to be sure, but I think there’s a case to be made. It’s got everything though: Dixy Lee Ray, pointless belligerence, and a crazy estimation of the American people.

All those Left Wing nuts and Ultraliberals who keep telling us that other nations, including our onetime Allies, now hate us, remind me of my old and deeply lamented friend, Gov. Dixy Lee Ray. When members of the press complained that she was too Conservative and too much like the teacher she was for more than 35 years, she would look to me and say: “They’ll take me as I am or they can very well shove it!”

Classy. Also, about half of the capital letters in this paragraph should have been lower case.

She said it many times, so I knew she meant it. And now, 15 years after her death, I can see her, the anger rising in her cheeks, telling the press once again to “shove it.” Of course, I wouldn’t let her say so directly to the press, because I knew it would appear in large headlines everywhere and would be the lead item in all radio and TV newscasts. But I’m sure they knew she would say something like that if asked in a press conference.

This was a strange state 40 years or so ago.

At any rate, I bring it up because her staunch resolve to be herself and not something the “gentlemen of the press” wanted her to be reminds me so much of the U.S. position in the world today. Many of the very same nations we’ve been sending our trillions in cash, food, materials, medicine, and other aid in the past half century have turned their backs on us and called us greedy, oil crazy, dictatorial, and warlike. Some have even called our President a latter-day Hitler!

Who called Obama that. Other than the teabaggers, of course? In more seriousness, maybe the problem is that we have been greedy, oil crazy, and warlike too often. That’s bad for us as well as for our allies, and the countries we’re belligerent to.

Recalling Dixy’s retort, then, I believe the U.S. should tell all our former “friends” to shove it, then call in all our loans to foreign nations (which they never intended repaying anyway) and every dime of our foreign aid. And maybe even recall every one of our diplomatic representatives abroad in the bargain. I just thought of one more: Stop all American tourists from visiting any of these hate-America nations and thus deprive them of the billions they gain in our tourist dollars.

Um, Lou. We borrow from many of the nations of the world, so I don’t see that going well. Also, banning tourism, huh? That won’t have any long term consequences.

We could also notify France, which has turned on us with a hatred never before seen in our relationship, that the next time that nation gets into trouble with its neighbors or anyone else on the globe, it will have to fight them without our troops, armaments, and air and sea power. We saved France’s fanny in two World Wars and did it again in Vietnam after they had botched Southeast Asia in spades. How many times is enough — especially when the people you have saved thrice turn on you and call you the scourge of the earth?

France is fighting alongside us in Afghanistan despite the fact that the war is very unpopular there. And, um, Viet Nam didn’t exactly go well for us (or the first World War, really, although we did “win” that one).

I don’t believe Congress would ever have the courage to do all the things I’ve suggested and cut off all foreign aid in toto, but I think the American people could force these actions with a nationwide memorandum to do so — a memorandum that would be made legal through initiatives in all 50 states. I’ll bet it would pass everywhere by at least a 95 percent vote!

I’d go out on a limb and say that if there was something popular with 95% of the people in 100% of the states politicians would have the courage to support that thing. But somehow I think that the numbers would be a little less for a travel ban to France, and a complete end of foreign aid.

It’s time to tell the world in no uncertain terms: “You’ll take us as we are, or you can damn well shove it!” Excuse me, Dixy; I added the “damn” for good measure!

I’d really like us to improve. It’d, you know, be good for us. The premise here seems to be that Dixy thought she was good enough therefore there’s no reason for America to improve ourselves. Holy shitballs.

This entry was posted on Monday, November 9th, 2009 at 5:14 pm and is filed under Carl. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.