EFFin’ Unsound

And look, here’s a fund raising letter from one of my favorite crazies (.pdf)!

Dear Friends of Faith & Freedom:

I like alliteration.

Most Christians are familiar with the verse written by the ancient prophet Ezekiel that says on behalf of God, “And I sought for a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none.” (Ez. 22:30).

That’s Zeke for you. Always talking about hedges and gaps and whatever.

There is an ever-widening gap between the biblical, traditional beliefs upon which this country was built, and the so-called “progressive” secularist view that in consistently moving our country and our communities further and further away from our spiritual roots.

I know, people are always forgetting how Jesus wrote the Constitution, and the Declaration of Independence.

While these folks are in the minority, they have cloistered themselves in the most influential positions – in education, in the media, and unfortunately, in our legislature. The results will be catastrophic.

The way you get to the legislature is by not being very popular.

Over the last few years, they have been able to advance the most aggressive, secularist agenda that we have ever seen in the State of Washington.

You can’t fire someone because they’re gay anymore and gay people can get some of the benefits of marriage. So the secularists are totally victorious.

The legislators have set in motion the legislative process to redefine the family and marriage by giving the homosexual community “domestic partnership” rights with supporting “hate crimes” legislation. This was done in response to the cry for “fairness” from the homosexual community, yet the very day Governor Gregoire signed the bill into law, Senator Ed Murray and other gay activists said, “No, this is not enough. We will not be happy until we have gay marriage.”

As is often times the case with things Gary Randall puts in quotation marks, don’t expect to find it using a Google search.

It is well-documented where the gay agenda wants to go in regard to marriage and family. It is not only marriage for homosexuals. The research paper, “Beyond Gay Marriage,” quotes their own leaders in painting a sad and dark future for the family as we know it and God intended it.

I mean just look at Canada where gay marriage has caused it to fall into the sea. Surely God will smite Washington the same way He did Massachusetts if we let gay people have any rights.

Public education is constantly moving your children and grandchildren (and mine) away from the traditional beliefs that we hold dear.

How does Gary even know what I hold dear? It certainly isn’t hate.

Less than two weeks ago, Seattle public school teachers were directed to recognize Thanksgiving as a day of mourning for some, not a day of thanksgiving and gratitude. That information is on our website.

Because knowing that some Native Americans might be upset about the reminder of what the country did to their ancestors is the same as destroying God.

Sex education has become, perhaps, the most fertile ground for this agenda, using information as “indoctrination.”

Stupid information. And we all know that nobody ever had sex before they were married until the public schools said it was OK.

The gap is widening – who will stand in it?

I’m not sure you can stand in a gap between the current values and some imagined values of a bygone era that really never existed in the first place.

Every year new conservative, Christian type organizations are started with the desire to address these issues – and every year, a few of them go away. All well intentioned, I’m sure, yet the other side keeps winning.

It’s totally not because they’re on the wrong side of history, so stop saying that. Also, didn’t you say a few paragraphs ago that the secularists said, “No, this is not enough. We will not be happy until we have gay marriage”? How can our side keep winning and still not have our agenda? Make up your mind.

People of faith and conservatives circle our campfires, warm our hands and tell each other how bad it is.

What the fuck is this camping metaphor doing? And why is the next paragraph going to take the fire metaphor to an odd extreme?

It is bad, but affirming the evil isn’t enough. And it isn’t the answer. Anyone can burn down a building, but it takes vision, skill and commitment to build one.

Anyone can burn down a building?

We can send our lobbyist to Olympia, and we will this coming January, we can give the press all kinds of sound bites and beat our chests with conviction, but in the end, a majority of the legislators will vote with the political wind because there are no consequences. The legislators will, for the most part, hear our lobbyists, if they are brief, but they will act on what they see as political expediency because there are no consequences.

I know I over use commas, but holy fuck, dude, try to parse those two senten,ces.

Gregoire will preside over it all and the Washington press will spread lies about Rossi, because in their world, there are no consequences.

Hey reporters! Next time you’re wondering if you should go to Gary Randall for a quote, try to remember this.

Unless – enough people will stand in the gap. We intend to create consequences.

I don’t think he knows how to use a dash.

Every time you write a check to Faith & Freedom or volunteer, you are standing in the gap and helping us create those consequences.

Who says you cannot serve God and Mammon?

Here are the 7 things we’re doing with your money this coming year.

Not my money.

1. Holding David Barton events around the state, educating people to our spiritual heritage. These events begin in January. See our website for more information.

Well if you’ve got someone else who makes up quotes, sign me the hell up!

2. Holding youth Leadership Conferences to help motivate and direct the next generation to stand in the gap with a biblical worldview. Our first was held in November and it exceeded our expectations. Dino Rossi and other outstanding leaders spoke to the kids about subjects ranging from forgiving and praying for your enemies to Intelligent Design to how to get into the entertainment industry to help Change Your Culture. More are scheduled around the state in 2008.

So just so we’re clear, sex ed is indoctrination, but this crap totally isn’t.

3. Having a full-time lobbyist in Olympia during the 2008 sessions. We will be there.

I’m sure the legislators can’t wait.

4. Holding candidate/coalition building workshops around the state. We have already held two. New candidates who are electable are emerging along with people from their area who will help them get elected. We have targeted certain districts and with your help can create change and consequences.

Surely there are 147 Ellen Craswells out there to run for every state house and state senate seat. Make it happen Ellens.

5. Holding voter registration events and community/state awareness sessions.

Are you aware that gay people want to be able to get married? Well give me money, and I’ll explain this dastardly fact.

6. Continue to use our website for these purposes; with current news, information, commentary and calendar of events. The traffic on our website is unbelievable. We are so grateful to all who visit it.

Even me? I’m honored.

7. We have set up a political action committee, Faith & Freedom PAC. Under state and federal regulation, it must be separated from Faith & Freedom Foundation and Network, which are both non-profit. That is done. Funds received for the PAC are not tax-deductible, but can be used for direct candidate advocacy. We are creating consequences with your support.

That’s why we’re using the non-profit’s web site and fund raising letter to mention our PAC’s fund raising.

These are not ideas; they are in motion and being executed as I write this letter to you.

Well, they’re barely ideas anyway.

Would you stand in the gap with us? And would you please do these three things?

I will do three things, but not these:

First, send the most generous, tax-deductible contribution possible to Faith & Freedom Foundation before the end of the year.

If you send it in January, you might as well be sending money to Satan.

Secondly, read the sample letter I have enclosed with this letter to you. We want to send it out to thousands around the state who share your beliefs, but do not know Faith & Freedom as well as you do. You may want to share this letter with your friends and please encourage them to sign up on our website for informational emails, alerts and events in their area.

Please, spam your friends.

And finally and most importantly, pray that God will bless these efforts. We feel these actions, with your partnership, with “Change the State in ’08.”

I’ve written a little prayer to help you out: “Dear Jesus, I know that women and girls are being kidnapped in the Congo and raped for months at a time, but if you could turn your attention to what’s really important, the gay quotient Washington State legislature, that would be helpful. Once you’ve ungayed the legislature, maybe you can focus on Africa or whatever.

“In your name we pray. Amen.”

Together we can make a difference.

Yippie.

Thank you in advance for your response.

Well, you’re welcome in real time.

Gary Randall
President and Chairman
P.S. Thank you for your generous contribution this month.

P.S. Sucker, I didn’t give a penny.

This entry was posted on Sunday, December 2nd, 2007 at 9:39 am and is filed under Carl. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.